Things to do if you're weird:        --submitted by galactic_zeb

* Convince neighbors that you have invented a 'SHRINKING'
device by ruffling your hair, wearing a white laboratory coat
and parking a JCB digger outside your house for a few days. Then
dim and flicker the lights in your house during the night and replace
the JCB, unseen, with a Tonka toy of the same description. Watch
their faces in the morning!
* Nissan Micra drivers. Attach a lighted sparkler to the roof of
your car before starting a long journey. You drive the things like
dodgem cars anyway, so it may as well look like one.
* Tape a chocolate bar to the outside of your microwave. If the
chocolate melts you will know that the microwaves are escaping and
it is time to have the oven serviced.
* A mouse trap placed on top on of your alarm clock will prevent you
from rolling over and going back to sleep.
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